So, I kind of feel like I’m in group therapy. “My name is Dorothy…” and Caroline (my faithful comrade at DFSCC) is making me do these “Doses of DFS” on Fridays. And I couldn’t be more out of my comfort zone. I don’t even like looking into photos directly unless a photographer forces me to. As extroverted as I might seem, I actually test on the extreme introvert side of the spectrum. Nobody ever believes me, so I have to pull the results up on my phone. Extrovert by trade, introvert by nature.
I think that as women it’s been ingrained within us to be demure and shy about accomplishments, working hard for what you want and achieving goals. Thankfully, women before us broke the glass ceiling, but remnants and sharp chards around the periphery still remain.
I see it every day. When other women don’t support each other, or when they tear others down. We’re all guilty of that. Why? Because we’ve been trained that women are supposed to fill certain roles, and it wasn’t too long ago (witness my grandmother’s generation) where a lady working outside the home was evidence of a lot less than her “achieving dreams.”
But when Caroline approached me last fall about her desire to start a blog to empower women of all ages, I thought “Well, sure, why not? Just do it.” And, by God, she sure did. And I couldn’t be more proud. Except I didn’t realize she meant I WOULD HAVE TO WRITE FIRST PERSON NARRATIVES OF MY LIFE. #oops
My “Dose of DFS” for the week (which is probably rather anti-climactic, sorry, Caro), is this: There’s always a better way. A better way to treat one another, a better way to inspire one another, a better way to mentor one another, a better way to support one another, a better way to show you care. There’s a better way to “do business” with people, because people are (in fact) people, and want you to view their business as if it’s your own. There’s a better way to arrange office furniture to ensure collaboration and creativity while fostering privacy, autonomy and independence.
When I think of “Doses of DFS” I think of my grandmother, Dorothy (the first, and I daresay the most, bold. . . I mean, she did wear stilettos on the treadmill when she went to the assisted-living facility, because she felt it made her look more “put together”). She always asked me, after a long day at the pool, “Well, did anyone compliment your bathing suit and ask to be your friend?” When I’d respond with, “No, not yet. . . ” She’d say, “Well they were thinking it.” Of course, then we’d arrive home and she’d pour herself a stiff dressing drink and let me play with her make-up and jewelry. And she believed in me, telling me, “If anyone ever tells you no, just find another way. You’re a Dorothy, and you take after me.” There we go. Thanks, Deeda.
At the end of the day, I guess I could sum up today’s “Dose of DFS” with this: be confident in what you know (without insulting others), know there’s always a better way to handle anything you encounter (and learn from these situations), and believe that a dressing drink for the evening is always a good idea.